I’ve been so preoccupied lately and this time it’s not because I’ve been traveling, instead I have been killing the dwelling game. I have probably spent more time at my house in the past several months than I have done in my entire life. Pregnancy has not only changed my body drastically but it has also changed my way of life completely. Sober living and a desire to take better care of myself and my home than ever before has turned me into much more of a homebody, and it’s been fantastic! In this time I’ve thought a lot about life in general and thanks to the unconditional support from my husband I have also made some big changes.
When I first became pregnant I was a little depressed to be honest. My whole life was changing and I hated it. To me it meant no more fun, and I’m all about having fun. I felt like being a parent was already not for me. Yeah that may sound silly but I liked my lifestyle pre-pregnancy and I thought that I was perfectly happy. Sure I was, but not as much as I thought. As my 29th birthday approaches and I think about my life now and how it will be in the near future, it’s actually now more than ever that I am truly happy. In just these past several months I have found out who my true friends are while actually expanding my friend circle at the same time [sometimes having a small clique is the worst thing you can do to yourself], stopped worrying what people thought of me [haters gonna hate], and ultimately have turned into a much calmer person because I’ve stopped giving two shits about the small stuff. Instead I have been working on turning my dreams into reality, spending more time with my loved ones and family, surrounding myself with people that energize me, and focusing on the things that keep me creative and happy. For the first time in a long time I feel content.
Since my last post I have quit my job that I thought would eventually turn into my career, signed up for college [again], and have started to pursue my dream of having my own business. So now you see why I’ve been so M.I.A.? It’s already been a challenging beginning, but like they say, nothing worth having comes easy. It’s time for me to start living my dreams and I could not be more excited. So now you’re probably thinking, how the hell am I content with all of these drastic changes in my life? Well, for the first time, I am not working at a job just to make a living and since I’m not partying all the time anymore, I’m not surrounded with people that just want to party. Instead, I’m finally pursuing a career that I am truly passionate about and that will allow me to be my most creative self, and I have people that are just as driven by my side. Not to say that I don’t like to have fun anymore, I don’t think that part of me will ever change, but it’s nice to have a balance and not be doing the same old shit. And sure this endeavor is going to probably take years for me to build into a successful business, but at least I will be happy, learning, growing, and be able to teach my daughter that those things are the more important things in life. Now I realize I haven’t exactly said what my new business move is, but I figured it’s just the beginning so why spoil all the fun already. And besides, that’s not really what I want you to focus on. Focus more on the fact that you really can live your dreams if you put your mind, heart, and soul into it and learn to be patient [and if I can learn to be patient, anyone can].